Especially for Brides
Bride in Miaos village in southwest China being prepared, dressed, and adorned in the traditional hand-embroidered costume with silver accoutrements. [Photographs courtesy of Wedding Ceremonies by Tiziana & Gianni Baldizzone] |
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Weddings and Honoring the Lineage of Women For thousands of years in cultures worldwide, young girls were taught the art of needlework. Like a girl in the Black Miao villages in southwest China or in the Rabari communities in northwest India where she might spend the early years of her girlhood embroidering her wedding costume.
But societies change, and today these girls—perhaps more skilled with a computer keyboard than with a needle—borrow their elaborate wedding costume from village elders. The world may change (and few women today in our culture make their wedding gown or stitch their trousseau) but women always love to connect in rituals of the heart, sharing their talents to champion another woman.
Sarah Merians & Company Wedding celebrations continue to offer many opportunities for women to relate to each other in ways that don’t take a lot of introduction, hearts are just naturally open. When there is a bride in the family or community, women love to share treasured objects, advice and memories, as well as their artistry and talents. That’s the beauty of the beloved bridal rhyme, “something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue, and a sixpence for your shoe.” If you are a bride, this is the most feminine of your bridal rituals. This folkloric verse presents perfect opportunities to create new or deepen or even mend relationships with family members and friends. You don’t merely borrow an heirloom wedding veil, you connect with a family heritage; you don’t simply wear Grandmother’s locket, you hold her heart in yours; you don’t just carry a vintage linen handkerchief, you receive blessings from the lineage of women. The quaint little rhyme—indeed, all wedding rituals if you keep your heart open—encourages gestures of intimacy, gratitude and inclusion at times when words are not always available.
When you’re a bride and busy planning your wedding, pass this on. Share something with your attendants in the spirit of this cherished womanly lineage. It doesn’t have to a physical gift; it can be a story from your own family background, a poem that touches you, or a hug that says “thank you from my heart.” Share yourself. ................................................................................................................................................... PHOTOGRAPHS: [Chinese bride] Courtesy of Wedding Ceremonies: Ethnic Symbols, Costume and Rituals by Tiziana & Gianni Baldizzone [middle] Sarah Merians & Company [bottom] Jason Hudson TEXT: excerpt from Cornelia's book The Bride's Ritual Guide: Look Inside to Find Yourself. (Buy a gift of the heart for a bride in your world!)
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Jason Hudson